Wednesday night Will signed online. The computer "Mooapos;d" and I said hello within two minutes of him signing on. I couldnapos;t wait any longer than that. He said hello back and we started conversing. After a little it of chit chat I asked what songs he would be singing. He named a couple of country songs, including the one he sang on the morning announcements months before. Iapos;ve never heard the other ones, so I didnapos;t know what to expect. So we started talking about music. He told me he only listened to country music. I said, "Country music isnapos;t my favorite, but I donapos;t mind listening to it every once in a while." That was a downright lie. I hated country music. I hated the sound, the lyrics, the image of the people who listen to it; I hated everything about it.
But I couldnapos;t tell Will the truth. I desperately wanted Will to think highly of me and I couldnapos;t do that without having a lot of things in common with him. Or at least thatapos;s what I thought at the time. But it makes sense right? I guess Iapos;m only trying to convince myself.
This would only be the beginning of so many little white lies that I would have to keep up for the many, many months to come.
It was Thursday. Karaoke day. We didnapos;t have school because it was Easter break. So I slept in as along as I could, which wasnapos;t long. I woke up the way kids wake up on Christmas. They barely get any sleep but theyapos;re too excited/anxious to care or realize that theyapos;re exhausted.
Around 7 that evening I got in my piece of shit van and headed towards the restaurant that was only about a three minute drive from my house. I got to the table and sat down with 11 other people (all girls) and just started talking. About 45 minutes passed and there was no sign of Will. Someone told me that he was with his Dad in the bar area which is where karaoke took place. But none of us were 21. We were a high school fan group. How could we get into a bar?
Shortly after I started thinking that we werenapos;t going to be able to see Will sing, he came over to the restaurant to visit with us. Someone asked what we should do and he said to stand outside of the bar because they keep the side door open which just happened to be right near the karaoke station. I brought my camera along. Iapos;m still not sure why I did this, but Iapos;m glad I did. I had to hand the camera to a friend though, because I didnapos;t want to my feelings for Will to be painfully obvious, because I was the only one with a camera. So she told me sheapos;d take pictures and videos of him singing for me.
About two hours later we walked outside and stood by the door. Willapos;s name was called out and he walked up to the stage. This time was no different, he still walked like he was carrying suitcases to show off his muscles. I couldnapos;t help but to crack a crooked smile. So he went up and started singing. Some of my friends were singing along with him, but I barely noticed because my eyes and ears were locked on what Will was doing. I couldnapos;t look away, no matter how hard I tried.
When the song ended, Will came outside to ask us what we thought. Everyone said how much they enjoyed it, but that they had to leave because it was getting late and they had to have their parents come get them. But I had my license. I could stay there. I could see Will sing one more song, but Iapos;d be standing alone in the parking lot. I didnapos;t mind, and neither did he.
About a half an hour passed and Willapos;s name was called again.
He got up in front of the room and started singing a slow, country love song. I donapos;t know why, but about halfway through the song a tear fell from my cheek. I didnapos;t even realize I was crying. Why was I crying? And whatapos;s worse than not knowing why I was crying is not knowing if it was a happy or a sad tear. What the hell was going on right now?
The song ended and I quickly wiped the tears from my cheeks as Will headed outside. He never noticed me crying and he still doesnapos;t to this day that his singing and presence made me cry. He asked me what I thought and asked what I was doing for the rest of the weekend, just to fill in the silence. He told me he was going away for the weekend with his family. I asked him if he would be able to get online the next morning before he left for the weekend. He told me he would, but it would be around 7AM. I told him that was fine. He still didnapos;t understand why he needed to get online. And I could tell he was confused.
So I pulled the envelope from my pocket, handed it to him, and told him I had to go.
He pocketed the envelope and walked back inside.
cloudscape create database, arnold chiari type 1, arnold chiari syndrome, arnold chiari symptoms, arnold chiari symptom, arnold chiari surgery.
